Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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