Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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