I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
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