Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
