can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
