I want to have your abortion
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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