you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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