I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
