Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(989): View more from Michigan

there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them

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(989): there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them http://tfl.nu/hqud

Replies (4) Good night (1224) Bad night (588)
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(831): View more from California

I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.

(1-831): View more from California

Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable

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(831): I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines. (1-831): Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable http://tfl.nu/f2l0

Replies (15) Good night (3518) Bad night (742)
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(847): View more from Illinois

So did the night end well for you?

(248): View more from Michigan

I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text

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(847): So did the night end well for you? (248): I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text http://tfl.nu/n8vz

Replies (31) Good night (1329) Bad night (9268)
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(516): View more from New York

Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?

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(516): Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me? http://tfl.nu/2ksh

Replies (63) Good night (6457) Bad night (1609)
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(616): View more from Michigan

the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.

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(616): the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles. http://tfl.nu/0i26

Replies (13) Good night (4014) Bad night (1214)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

i cant cry in cvs. not again.

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(803): i cant cry in cvs. not again. http://tfl.nu/7epn

Replies (8) Good night (1059) Bad night (3741)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.

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(479): I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke. http://tfl.nu/g10c

Replies (4) Good night (2956) Bad night (1199)
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(480): View more from Arizona

I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.

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(480): I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies. http://tfl.nu/khmt

Replies (9) Good night (6019) Bad night (1236)
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(906): View more from Michigan

I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.

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(906): I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/hho5

Replies (13) Good night (2702) Bad night (677)
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(480): View more from Arizona

"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"

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(480): "The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!" http://tfl.nu/bdi6

Replies (3) Good night (1048) Bad night (465)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS

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(610): YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS http://tfl.nu/d44z

Replies (6) Good night (494) Bad night (850)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.

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(+44): We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever. http://tfl.nu/yqo8

Replies (3) Good night (1002) Bad night (412)
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(925): View more from California

Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.

(1-925): View more from California

Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.

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(925): Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles. (1-925): Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive. http://tfl.nu/bo4j

Replies (1) Good night (546) Bad night (348)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....

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(706): I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it.... http://tfl.nu/dz68

Replies (3) Good night (536) Bad night (300)
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(812): View more from Indiana

I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements

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(812): I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements http://tfl.nu/lao5

Replies (0) Good night (526) Bad night (221)

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