it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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