At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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