Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
