Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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