Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize