woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
