Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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