Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
