No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
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when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
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When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize