I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
