He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
