Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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