i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
