she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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