Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
