She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
