Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
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