I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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