I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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