you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
