I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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