btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
