it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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