yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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