We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Randomize
