it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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