I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize