If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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