At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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