I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
there was a trapeze. enough said
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
