therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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