He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize