Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Damn victory sex feels great
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
