All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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