his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Randomize
