I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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