Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
