it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
