She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
