I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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