Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my sisters under your porch take her home
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
